Scary stories from a lovely place
Yesterday afternoon I had, what is known in the scary world of pregnancy, a bloody show. This is and isn’t what it sounds like. It’s not watching a Quentin Tarantino movie or a bull fight in Spain. That would be cool, and would indeed be a bloody show. Rather it’s when you’re very pregnant and go to the bathroom and when you flush the toilet notice some blood mixed in with the paper and water. (No more graphic detail I promise.)
Blood is the pregnant woman’s nemesis. During the first 3 intangible months of pregnancy any sign of blood is cause for major concern, even though when you take these symptomns to a doctor they tell you there’s nothing they can do to help. Blood is serious throughout, except for right now it would seem.
Upon my bloody show I freaked out a little, hastily packed my bag (Seinfeld dvd’s included) and waited for any signs that the show was going to develop into something really exciting, like a miniseries perhaps. When it didn’t and Stephen came home to absorb my freaking out we phoned the midwife who was as nonchalant as ever. So it turns out the bloody show is a bit of a non-event.
Last weekend we were visiting this same nonchalant midwife who explained the signs of labour. She talked for a while about seeing different shows and how they would vary and what they would mean. I knew Stephen had no idea what she was talking about. It was quite enjoyable watching his bemused face as he imagined watching movies, plays and musicals, but then began to put the true meaning together in his head. On the way home we had a good laugh about how different shows; maybe Robin Hood or watching lots of episodes of The Office, could bring on labour.
Jokes aside, show or no show, it’s getting close and I don’t know anything. I’ve forgotten my lines for this particular show, or I never really knew them, it’s like they forgot to send me the script and now filiming is about to begin and I know I’m going to make a fool of myself. At least Stephen is relatively calm, but he only has a minor part, not a speaking role like me. Who has my script?