Scary stories from a lovely place

Kim is defacebooked

Late last night, or very early this morning I was wide awake. Before you blame Silas, don’t. He was sleeping peacefully, as was Stephen. My racing mind and disgruntled heart were keeping me from entering the same peaceful state. Lots of things had prompted my anti-reverie – namely church politics, but also mere frustrations of life. As such I wiled away the time perusing bigoted homeschooling blogs (seriously why do i do it to myself? It’s like a car crash), digesting Dickens’ Bleak House and looking at facebook.

I was struck afresh by how easy it is to waste time looking at other people’s lives, or the bits they choose to show on facebook. I am often amazed how easy it is to let 45 minutes disappear merely by looking at people’s photos from their latest beach holiday or reading inane status updates, all the while feeling a bit jealous and trying to dream up my own witty comment for the day. Many times I have considered ditching facebook but feel too bound to the (sort of) community there. While it is a good way to stay in contact with friends who live far away, it is also too easy to waste time and envy others’ cool lives. So I did the deed. I don’t know if it was the madness in my mind brought on by the lateness of the hour or the inspiration to a better life provided by Dickens’ Esther Summerson but I did it. I de-facebooked myself. It was surprisingly easy. Just a few clicks here and entering a password or two and I am free.

I’m really enjoying it this morning. When I am at home I probably check my email and facebook every couple of hours, depending on how bored or distracted I am. Lately I have taken to turning off the internet to save power which has helpfully dissuaded me from looking at it too often. This morning I nearly checked Stephen’s just to get my fix of people’s updates for the morning, but I resisted. That would be cheating.

It’s funny to realise how much of my thought patterns were dominated by facebook. This morning I’ve been up for about 4 hours and I’ve already mused about 4 different status updates for myself. “Kim wants to play the trumpet” while watching Les Miserables with Silas. “Kim is filing Stephen’s life away” while sorting out our papers from the last few months. “Kim is loving porridge this morning” while making breakfast. Don’t you wish I had posted those gems for your enjoyment?

The other funny thing about facebook self-delineation is the profile picture. It often amuses me the image people choose for themselves and what they are trying to say about their personality or life. I often wonder about my own motives too as I toss up between being ‘Sporty Kim’ or ‘Married Kim’ or ‘Mama Silas’ or ‘Just chilling Kim’ or ‘Pretty Kim’ or ‘Fun Kim’. Oh the choices.

My only genuine regret about divorcing Mark Zuckerberg is that I won’t be able to plug Kimlovesjozi when I post. So the pressure is on to make the blog popular without the help of shameless self promotion.

Tell your friends.


12 comments on “Kim is defacebooked

  1. Mim
    October 6, 2010

    Yeah go you!!! I know exactly what you mean, you have put it into the words I haven’t been able to find. Facebook eats away at your time, and I am oh so guilty of the status updates reflecting who I feel like being. I have been tempted to pull the plug also…. but started slowly, but culling a few hundred ‘friends’ first. You have inspired me to leave the network too….the main thing keeping me from deleting my account is that i keep thinking it’s a great way to keep all my photos safe, if ever another fire comes through town (which is bound to happen soon!).

    Thanks for the inspiration, I will miss your presence! ๐Ÿ™‚ But your blog site is in my list of favourites so I will check it regardless haha

    • kimlovesjozi
      October 6, 2010

      I did think of the photos thing too Mim. But I’ll let you in on a little secret… I’ve just deactivated the facebook account, so anytime I can reactivate it and everything will be as it was. I haven’t actually deleted the account, for exactly those reasons. Stephen recently lost all my data from my computer (I’ve tried so hard not to be annoyed!) including all my pictures from the last 3 years so I need those ones. But I tried to copy some of my pictures from facebook to my new computer (mainly ones of Silas’s first few days) but I couldn’t work out how to do it. Right click wouldn’t work, it just flicked to the next picture when I tried.

  2. Bec
    October 6, 2010

    Well done my dear ๐Ÿ™‚

    I keep going on each day and just getting annoyed at it… I sit there not only wasting time looking at pointless stuff, but half the time things don’t load properly and you’re going back and forth through pages and trying to find the comment someone made or the picture of something. Time just keeps disappearing into the black hole of Facebook.
    Plus I sit there and get so frustrated that I’m obviously being stalked on every electronic move I make as the ads tell me to… book a holiday to Europe, have a miracle baby, read the bible (by daily updates of course) and have a manicure…
    Not sure if I’m ready to pull the plug… but I’m close.
    I’ll have to set up a blog organiser thingy as I had planned so I can know when you’ve updated your blog.

  3. kimlovesjozi
    October 6, 2010

    Do it McEvoy! I feel great. Honestly, I feel really emancipated.

    • Bec
      October 7, 2010

      hmm… my main hesitation is the few people that I hardly ever see/never see and who I know I wouldn’t keep in touch with (cos I’m hopeless when it comes to keeping in touch with people…grr me). There’s a few people who I’d like to be a part of my life but I’m not sure how else I would keep if it weren’t for FB.
      I’m thinking I’ll go cold turkey for a bit… have a bit of a break… see how I go…
      Maybe I need to create a new account and only let a very selected few be my friends… Or start savagely deleting ๐Ÿ™‚

      • kimlovesjozi
        October 7, 2010

        Yeah that was another one of my concerns and I will regret that a little I think. But the negatives far outweighed the positives for me. You are much more mature than me so I’m sure you don’t waste as much time as I did!

  4. Jenny
    October 6, 2010

    I wondered why I had less friends today…

  5. Mim
    October 6, 2010

    By the way Kim, I plugged your blog for you today on my last status update before I too deactivated my account ๐Ÿ™‚

    • kimlovesjozi
      October 6, 2010

      Wow wow wow! Good work, on both counts. Enjoy the freedom! I feel more human now for some reason.

  6. ellidhcook
    October 7, 2010

    So no more facebook but replacing it with twitter? You are so the cool kid!
    Good effort hen, but it does mean you’re going to blog more so that I don’t miss out on your life!x

    • kimlovesjozi
      October 7, 2010

      I think I will blog more because of all the time saved! And I will put photos of Silas there… not sure how that will relate to Jozi but I’ll try somehow. I did join Twitter. Stephen thinks it’s pretty silly that I swapped facebook for another community website which is basically just status updates. But I want to try and follow businesses and people that I like rather than friends. But you make the cut of course ๐Ÿ™‚

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This entry was posted on October 5, 2010 by in Beefs and tagged , , , , , .
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